Fictional Farewells

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Yes it’s pretty much a joke, but that’s my official birthday cake for this year, courtesy of my uber-honest girlfriends who dropped by at my place minutes before midnight to celebrate the countdown to my turning twenty-one last September tenth. Oh, how I love them to pieces.

Still, getting another year older makes me cringe a bit despite all the goofball-cheer effort I’m exerting to welcome it with arms-wide open. There’s just something so plain scary with growing up that feels maddening sometimes; like I’m being pulled away towards another far-away; like I’ve got a time-bomb waiting for me to say goodbye to being a kid. And this makes me secretly sad. Ah, look at me getting all philosophical and pensive again!

And when was the last time I made my last mixtape, by the way? Goodness, I feel so ancient. Here’s the set of songs I’ve been abusing on my playlist for the last couple of weeks. On a totally irrelevant sidenote, though: Forgive me, my dear blog, for having abandoned you too long. I swear I’ll make it up to you. I swear.

10. Sun in an Empty Room, The Weakerthans

Take eight minutes and divide (sun in an empty room)
By ninety million lonely miles (sun in an empty room)
Watch the shadow cross the floor (sun in an empty room)
We don’t live here anymore (sun in an empty room)

09. 
Cosmic Love, Florence + the Machine

I took the stars from our eyes, and then I made a map
And knew that somehow I could find my way back
Then I heard your heart beating, you were in the darkness too
So I stayed in the darkness with you

08. See You, Benjamin Francis Leftwich

In a year or ten,
I will be there
I will come for you
When you are on your own
On a chair
In a room with no one else
I will touch your hand
And say I understand

What we lost
Was equal to the cause
Of my skin on yours
And say you want it back

If you get time
Come back and be mine
If you pass by
I will see you in the sky
I hope that you’re told
I was young, now I’m old
If you pass by
I will see you in the sky

07. Bright White Lights, Whitley

I was walking down a dark black road
I was chasing a bright white light
I’m sinking in a deep blue ocean
I’m flying in a clear blue sky
I’m screaming at a large, deaf monster
As I’m falling from the fifteenth floor

I will make it through this
I will make it through this

06. Wake me when it’s over, Longwave

When the weight is on your shoulders
Come on your knees
When the weight is on your shoulders
Come on your knees
Wake me when it’s over
Wake me please

05. When I grow up, First Aid Kit

I’m very good with plants
When my friends are away
they let me keep the soil moist
On the seventh day I rest
for a minute or two
then back on my feet and cry for you oooh oh

You’ve got cucumbers on your eyes
Too much time spent on nothing
waiting for a moment to arise
The face in the ceiling and arms too long
I wait for him to catch me

Waiting for you to embrace me

04. Only the Young, Brandon Flowers

Look back in silence
The cradle of your whole life
There in the distance
Losing its greatest pride
Nothing is easy, nothing is sacred, why?
Where did the bow break?
It happened before your time

And there were people there
Lovely as you’d ever care
Tonight, baby, you can start again
Laughing in the open air
Have yourself another dream
Tonight, baby, we can start again

03. Arms that hold the universe, Fee

I know it seems
Like this could be
The darkest day you’ve known
But believe you me
The God of strength
Will never let you go
He will overcome, I know

And the arms that hold the universe
Are holding you tonight
You can rest inside
It’s gonna be alright
And the voice that calmed the raging sea
Is calling you His child
So be still and know He’s in control
He will never let you go

02. Never Say Never, The Fray

Some things we don’t talk about
Rather do without
And just hold the smile
Falling in and out of love
Ashamed and proud of
Together all the while

You can never say never
While we don’t know when
But time and time again
Younger now than we were before

01. When I Go, Slow Club

If we’re both not married by 22,
Could I be so bold and ask you?
If we’re both not married by 23,
Will ya make my year? Ask me.

If we’re both not married by 24,
Will you pass me those kneepads and I’ll get on the floor?
If we’re both not married by 25,
I hope that this sun-childish spark’s still alive

Cause there are so many lessons
That I just never cancelled on
And there are so many questions
That still burn
Like will you hold my hand when I go?

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