Ambition: Androgyny


Yes, I know it’s creepy, beyond delusional, extremely preposterous and what-on-earth-was-I-thinking insane. But indulge me, ok? Haha. 

So last October 26, a few days after I resigned from work, I decided on cutting my hair too. I think I mentioned in my previous posts that the last time I had an extreme haircut was back in January of 2008, making it more than three years ago since I did something equally drastic.

Anyway, this previous stunt I pulled wasn’t something I did out of a whim or anything. (My mom is a little scared about it at first, and I’m not quite sure how dad will react once he arrives this December.) It’s actually been part of my odd list of dreams for quite some time already. As expected though, my friends became hysterical when I posted a photo on facebook. And let me quote myself here: Yes, one of my quirky ambitions is to become gwapo. (Surprisingly, I looked decent as a guy, I guess, since I’ve gotten a couple of compliments saying so.) It’s overwhelming and flattering to be androgynous, I must say.

It has its perks and downsides though. Of course, getting rid of the hassle brought by long hair is already a given, but having a hair this short has really been a liberating experience. I don’t mind the weather as much anymore, so it’s no big deal if it’s extremely hot outside. I also don’t have to scavenge the house for my missing ponytails since it’s no longer necessary. Plus, I can dress shabbily to my heart’s content. Lol. (Having long curly hair like before somehow imposes a girly, straight-laced demeanour that I always have to be properly dressed everywhere.) However, disadvantages are inevitable, of course. To my horror, I’ve been invited to three weddings recently, and you can probably picture me struggling over having boy-hair and being a bridesmaid. Yeah, it’s so hard and embarrassingly awkward that I won’t go to further details. What’s even worse, there has been a couple of incidents where friends of my closest girl friends mistake me for being their boyfriend, whenever I post on their facebook walls! My ambiguous name doesn’t help, either. Hahaha.

And well, sometimes, I just go melodramatic whenever I see girls that have the same hairstyle I had back then. It’s nostalgia kicking in, I guess. Or maybe I just frequently miss my hair a lot. Everything’s good though. I really enjoy how I look right now, and I’d like to view it as a symbolic turning over of a new leaf in my life chapter. It’ll probably be a long time before it grows back, but for now I’ll just have fun being androgynous, because, you know, I just love adventure that much.


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